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Thanks for your blog. The first thing she has got me to do is to tell my husband he is to stop reassuring me….. I found this bizarre at first but on reading your blog and exploring the idea further I can see that his constant reassurance — which I thought was always helpful, keeps me coming back for me and in a way feeds my anxiety. Not to say this will be bad or good or either but that we had fallen into these roles of me needing him to reassure me all would be alright and that i guess I had stopped being able to do that for myself.
I actually feel very empowered in knowing that I had been doing this and am now working on believing in myself and trusting that all will be ok. Thanks for your great post. My daughter is 17 and seems to need constant reassurance , so much so she is reaching out to boys to get it. They obviously are not mature enough to see this and may use her in the process.
Thank you for your kind words. Hey Vicky, How about an age appropriate book about self-esteem? Your post is specific to my situation. I have decided to stop seeking the reassurance of others and find in myself the same. From some of the comments on here of fellow travelers it seems like a muscle that can be exercised and progressively strengthened.
Coming from all angles and response to reading most of the articles, i have never seen so many people with problems. Hopefully the sex part is full of intimacy which has a huge part in how people are to one another and in their emotions of responses. Humans need to have intimacy and human contact to survive as a species. Its that being denied of the emotion and physical aspect that begins the insecurities. You are your own person, you decide how you want to live. No one is perfect, and if you think you need to be like someone else, then you are thinking Wrong.
I feel that for the most part that feeling of acceptance and need to be accepted is a form of a disease that is developing in a person. Isolation, abandonment ,Ignoring of a person or another human. Are all factors that lead into that feeling. Something with a brief purpose,but not used frequently. The only cure is to overcome the thoughts of being not liked or accepted.
Stop complaining and worrying, and make the most of what you have with what you got for time being. That is how the beast is killed. And pretty much that is it in a nutshell. Even saying that sounds so stupid , say it to yourself a dozen times if you have too. You will see the result. Thank you so much! Thanks this post has some where given me that reassurance which I was seeing v badly form past few days. This was a great read and hit the nail on the head for me.
Do you want to be with me forever? Are you in love with me?